randomrabbit's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Get me Norris McWhirter I think it�s a record I decided that I can�t afford Tom�s wedding in Cyprus, and as it�s somewhere I don�t really want to go I obviously told him I�d definitely be there so stick me down for the �meal� and get 2 dozen more cocktail sausages on order. Meh. I�d be gutted if I missed it, so it�s off to Ayia Napa in October to folk out with my bloke out or whatever it is you kids do these days. I haven�t booked my flights or hotel or even dug out my Speedos yet, but in theory at least I�m there. The government would like us to spend money we don't have to revive the economy, so I go not for me but for my country. There�ll probably be a badge or certificate or something. There�s a stag do too to pay for which�ll be another small fortune since a few ales followed by tying the groom naked to a lamp post hoping he gets bummed doesn't seem to cut it any more. And then the Hadrian�s Wall walk and Scottish cock waving won�t be cheap neither. I may have to sell a body part. Spleen anyone? Chris�s obviously - carved out with a rusty spoon. I�m not daft enough to sell my own. So last night I reckon I was about an inch, or maybe an inch and a half, away from getting punched in the head in the gym changing rooms for laughing at a chap�s wee cock. It�s tricky now though, it used to be all the benches were round the edge so you were never too close to anyone else, but now they�re all higgledy-piggledy and you get various fleshy protuberances coming at you from all angles. There�s a little bit that we rather maturely and somewhat unimaginatively call The Naked Corner where I swear people don�t even use the gym, they just come to stand about in the nip. And I'm sure they chose that bit because it's the furthest away from the showers so they get to travel the greatest possible distance in the nude. Unfortunately Naked Corner was the only place free to get changed, and we were all �Ha get in it�s empty� and then a bloke followed us in and within about 3 seconds had dropped his shorts and was stood there naked - specifically from his waist down to the top of his socks. Who the fuck gets undressed in that order? I shall firstly remove my pants thusly spending the maximum amount of time with my knob out. Kevin smirked which set me off sniggering and the more I tried to stop the worse it got and I reckon if he could have believed that a grown man would actually be laughing at the sight of his little winky poking out from under his t-shirt he�d have belted me one. And rightly so. Oh to be a grown up. And that concludes today�s penis story. None of that was in the slightest what I was going to say but now I�m a bit tired all of a sudden. Ah well. Pleasant pancaking x 11:56 p.m. - 2009-02-24 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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